Friday, September 24, 2010

Clueless

"Do not judge those who try and fail, judge those who fail to try."

I can't sleep and don't have a clue why I woke up early in the morning... It doesn't matter at what time I slept but nowadays I have been waking up early in the morning around 2am - 5am. And now I can't get my eyes shut or get back to sleep... But i swear, i really am tired... I always have a problem when it comes to afternoon or evening, I tend to get very sleepy but still, I stayed awake.. Reasons, I'm outside or else, I'm at work... I don't know what is bothering me now.. I don't know what is exactly on my mind every now and then.. Call me a daydreamer now because I could just stare blankly without knowing what is actually in my mind. Oh, Someone help me.. What is wrong with me? Perhaps, I didn't get enough of sleep, huh?

Though, my situation now is bad with unanswered questions, Hubby had never fail to make me smile and at the same time mad too... I was suppose to smile and yes, I wanted to smile but there is something that holds back my smile and that it make me feel irritated.. Weirdly, I felt sinful and guilty after I got irritated when hubby was trying to make me smile. Oh God, Thank you 'cause you exist him in my life and I don't know who else could I ever turn to if I don't have him around. Everyone is busy with their own life, their own problems..

Baby,

I want to thank you for everything. Thank you for being patient with my attitude problems. I'm really proud of having you as my one and only .. Not only that I'm proud but I'm glad I knew.. I'm glad that I took the risk of meeting you. If I disagreed of meeting you that day, I think I would be crying my hearts out due to not having anyone to turn to.. Thank you for helping me.. You helped me to pull up the load.. I don't know how to say it out or elaborate it to make you feel satisfied but there is one thing for sure... I love you very much and there is noone else could ever replace you, baby. I will wait for you, dearest.