Friday, January 8, 2010

Approval seems to be needed.

I wish i am what i am not.

I wish I could control myself from being too over sensitive.
I wish I could control myself from whatever i desire to eat.
I wish I could control myself from making too many mistakes.
I wish I could be what i am not.

I wish i could be somebody else.
Be Beautiful,
Be Intellient,
Be Good,
Be whatever i am not.

I don't wanna be fat.
I don't wanna be stupid.
I don't wanna be the worst they ever had.

I don't wanna look myself in the mirror while the hatred for myself grew in me stronger as ever.
I don't wanna end up punching the mirror.
I don't wanna hate myself.
I have improved better than last time but still, approval from others isn't there.

Goodbye.

Much Love, RizahDarling.